Monday, July 26, 2010

I Gave My Love a Mullet...

Friday afternoon Lucas and I were swimming off the dock on a float while Dean cast-netted for bait fish. He tossed a couple of little pinfish our way as a joke - haha, that's funny, you missed. But then he carefully selected a fingerling mullet (that's a baby mullet, but it's bigger than your finger) and prepared to throw. I growled a warning, but it went unheeded and the man has good aim. That fish scored a bulls-eye right on my belly, whereupon I commenced flailing and hollering. (I didn't scream, I hollered - it's lower pitched). My bikini bottom has extra fabric around the waist for storing Twinkies or your muffin-top, and that's where the mullet went. I may have said some ugly things; the white-hot rage I felt makes it hard to remember. I was off the float splashing around to clear him out, and then I realized the current was really strong and we needed to swim harder to get to the ladder. Lucas abandoned the float and got to the ladder first, then I finally made it after hard swimming and hauled the float with me up the ladder.

As I laid the float on the pier, something silver caught my eye. It was the bottom half of the mullet...hanging from the right cup of my bikini top (a split second of "What is that? It CAN'T be!"). Then he started wriggling (rising panic gives way to a full-fledged freak-out...pause to picture woman in bikini screaming and jumping around on dock while grabbing her right breast.)

I finally succeeded in getting him out, and he slipped between two boards in the dock to swim to freedom...I wonder if he swam by the 3 fishermen in the boat at the next dock who were watching the whole thing.

3 comments:

KID, MD said...

Oh my gosh, the mental image...
Thanks! I needed that laugh!

Pammie said...

Wow!! That is icky!!! Good story!! So yucky.

Junior said...

Well that cracked me up just imagining it but ICK!!!!