A Little SNL

Betty White rocked! She's awesome - just her facial expressions are funny. There were a bunch of good skits and a digital short that they haven't put up yet - I'll keep an eye out.

This is along the lines of "Schwetty balls," for SNL fans. Mildly offensive - no kids allowed!


This one's funny and not offensive at all...I don't think.


Now I'm off to cut out Lucas's shorts...

Happy Mother's Day!

What a fabulous Mother's Day weekend I had! Drew made homemade calzones for me Friday night (cooking camp last summer - priceless!). He also refused to smile for a picture, but we'll cut him some slack since he's 13.



Lucas made me a beautiful photo holder and wrote a nice letter about how great I am at sewing (flattery is always appreciated!).



Dean cooked me a special dinner Saturday night and a fabulous breakfast this morning complete with 2 pots of my favorite flowers.



Jake was a good boy and came back from chasing herons without my having to call him. (He asked me to post his "king of the world" pose instead of his usual boat pose with his tail between his legs.)



Now I'll tell you the best Mother's Day gift I got this weekend - my children enjoyed each other's company and had a blast with each other the whole time. Of course your kids love YOU and are nice to YOU, but when they're nice to each other it makes life worth living. And I'm proud that when Drew wasn't wearing a bathing suit, he was wearing the shorts I made him (yes, for 3 solid days - I washed them Saturday night after he went to bed). Now he's asked me for a matching shirt...let's not discuss where he got his fashion sense.

Now you say, "But Lynn, where are the pictures of you?" Well here they are - keep in mind my bathing suit is modest and you'll see no shave or wax marks, so these photos are from G-rated spots (not to be confused with "the" G-spot, I don't even know where that is...exactly). But there's no need to try and guess where they came from (uh, my shoulder and my knee - satisfied?); I only post them to show what happens when you don't sunscreen because it's OVERCAST, and of course you can't burn when it's overcast, right?




Well, the sun DID come out for 20 minutes. And my shorts and Tshirt got wet at the beach so I took them off and had the bathing suit on underneath. But I didn't EXPECT to do that so I hadn't sunscreened that area. Take a lesson.

So I hope you all had a happy Mother's Day weekend as well, and remember your skin cancer prevention. (I hear that train a'comin'...)

Junior Kicks Ass!

Well I'm so proud of my little sister, who used to go by "Sister" here till we realized how confusing that was, so now she's "Junior." She told me that yesterday she and my nephew stopped for gas and while she was filling up, a man on the other side of the pump filled his tank then watched her a while. He then started to approach her so she knocked on her van window and my nephew jumped into view with a cell phone to his ear (I'm not ordering a pizza here, mister!) The guy then proceeded to ask her something about her car and made unintelligible conversation at her while stepping toward her, and her ladies' self-defense training kicked into action.

Now first I have to tell you our background - we are meek little Southern belles who have never spoken ugly to anyone not related to us. When she and I were living together my first year of medical school, a man knocked on the door selling magazine subscriptions. I looked over his paper and he told me he was so hot and thirsty, could he possibly have a drink of water? (Well of course, Sir, come right on in!) I had a bad feeling, but I said I'd get him something and he asked to come into the air conditioning. Tracey shot daggers at me when I let him in, but she fetched him a glass of water. He then smiled at us and said, "Now I need you to do one...more...thing for me..." This is when I'm picturing us bound with duct tape and stuffed in the trunk of a car - why am I so stupid and gullible? We both must've looked like deer in the headlights, and he said, "I need you to have a great day!" I think we both soiled our pants in relief (then she ran to the phone as fast as she could to call our mother and tell on me).

So you're wondering what Tracey's training has enabled her to do at this gas station....well she looks the guy straight in the eye and says loudly, "If you mess with me, I'll kick your ass."

HOO-AHHHH - go Sister! I mean Junior!

What Do You Wear With These Shorts?

Here they are on the actual child. This is what he wore to dinner. (But you know, it was to eat oysters, so obnoxious shorts and non-matching T-shirt are totally in order, and where are the flip-flops?).





OH - I have to say that American Idol was much more interesting last night, mainly because Harry Connick, Jr. volunteered his services to clean up the suckiness. He literally came out and said that he wanted to do the arrangements for each contestant and play with them on stage, and by golly, that did the trick! The contestants still sucked but at least HC provided comic relief. My #1 is now Lee - they had some fun chemistry together, and #2 is Big Mike because he's good at Sinatra, which was the theme. Sister Girlfriend (why can't I remember that chick's name?) did well, though the judges no-likey. And I liked Aaron, but Casey was BO-RING! Let's see, what did he do on stage....he blinked, and he took a few steps, and he blinked some more, and at the end he waved his arm around a little bit to indicate the big band was wrapping it up. I don't believe he bent his knees or his waist during the whole song - maybe we need to get him to a chiropractor or orthopedist - he could be suffering from spinal fusion or something! (I need to send him some jeans with zippered pockets - that'll inspire some boogey.)

Where did "Storm's a-Comin'" Come From?

Uh, yeah, Drew said the waistband of the shorts was itchy where the zipper comes up too far. Gotta fix that. He also asked me if I was sure I put the button on correctly. (No, baby, you know Momma's got Mad Cow.) He asked me if I could redo the fly with a normal button, so I shall close the existing buttonhole (Really? How you gonna do that? I don't know, but stop talking to yourself.) and put a new one on the front like a RTW pair of shorts.

That aside reminded me of a poem:

Roses are red, violets are blue.
I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.

But that crazy kid liked the shorts enough to wear them to dinner out! (I didn't say we were happy that he wore them to dinner.) And yes, we had a dozen oysters at Sunday lunch and 2 dozen oysters at dinner last night. Gotta get 'em while the gettin's good, people. (Oil spill's a-comin!) Maybe I overdosed on wine tonight...

Camping and Boys' Shorts

Well the Cub Scout campout at Blakely State Park was a great success, if you call 80-degree weather with 100% humidity and overcast skies a success (I know I do!). It was so hot at night that we had to sleep with the tent door/window open and just the screens closed, and Lucas slept in his underwear, but that's not really an option for the mothers on the trip. You know I would've preferred to do it the BOW way, with a bottle of wine and my short PJ's, but I suffered it out in the jeans and T-shirt to avoid embarrassing anyone passing by and glancing in the tent. I DID take the bra off to maximize sleeping comfort (Hey Lucas, when did your brother get here? Oh, that's your mother).

I actually kind of have today off, so I finished Drew's shorts - yippee! Now I branched out again and did what I think is a flat-felled seam...could be a French seam...I have no idea. This is the seam allowance of the inner leg seam - look, Ma, no raw edges!


This is how it looked on the outside - a topstitching 2-for-1 - I'll definitely do this from now on.


I also did some extra topstitching like his RTW shorts, since the pattern doesn't call for any except the hem, fly, and pockets.



Based on a RTW pair I did 3 rows around the waist, which was faced, and can I tell you how much that facing sucks? I would've finished these last night but I got stuck and couldn't figure out the instructions at all. What I realized this morning is that I used a Betzina fly which is already topstitched, and they want you to wait till the end to do that, so I couldn't fold out the fly to attach to the facing. I just turned under the facing ends 1/4" then attached, understitched the seam allowance, and topstitched the facing down.



And notice there's no button on the front. For some reason they make you button it toward the inside, which always leaves an imprint on my belly - we'll see if Drew minds it. I don't understand this, except that the pattern calls for a webbed belt to be worn with it.



And notice how far away the button is from the fly edge. The buttonhole is actually like the 5th step, but I should've saved it for last in case of fitting issues. I debated adding a hook and eye closure but decided Drew won't care. I can add it later. Anybody with facing tips at the fly? I couldn't find anything in Power Sewing. You may also notice I have trouble with my zipper going all the way to the top on the right front. I'm sure there's a point where I'm supposed to cut it off and finish it nicely. Hmm....

Boys' Shorts - Almost Done!

(This is what you get with a 7-yr-old and an iPhone - blurry pictures!)


Got Drew's shorts underway - that's a pretty fast pattern! It's got about 12 pieces for the shorts, rivaling the Betzina jeans, but I'm done except for fitting, hemming, and carriers. Now it's awfully big, as evidenced by my fitting in them (Drew's competing at a tech fair today), and they're WAY too long, so I may have to forgo the cargo pockets because we'll be cutting these off just above the knee.

On Lucas's I think I'll downsize, although this would make a nice pair of pants!

And here's what Dean saw near sunset yesterday at the beach. I'm hoping that bodes for a lovely rain-free Cub Scout campout at Blakeley today. I also hope that bodes well for oil-recovery efforts in the Gulf. Nice that there are already several lawsuits filed from Mississippi to Pensacola, and oddly enough, the same lawyer was on the news Thursday representing the residents of Dauphin Island and then again Friday representing commercial fishermen in Pensacola. Funny that he didn't look terribly upset about the whole thing. Oh, I better not even go there - and I apologize if you resemble that remark! Gotta go pack the tent and sleeping bags.