Tuesday, December 30, 2008

More Foosball Action!

This was a very competitive game between Scott/Kaye and Joe/Lucas (the score was 0-10, so by competitive I mean tense). I'm not sure who was the most revved up - I missed the part where Kaye started trash-talking and her cheeks turned blood red as she used excessive body English on the table! You can see Scott switch their positions once, but he did it about 3 times. I finally said, "Kaye, if you want to win you need to move to the other side of the table!" Scott was not amused.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Foosball for Special People

Here's part of game 3 in the first round of the GFT (Great Foosball Tournament). They put up a good fight but eventually succumbed to the foosball stylings of Dean and Drew, who went on to the finals and came in 2nd place. I can't remember if Tracey and Elizabeth beat Mom and me in the loser's consolation tournament - lost the sheet of paper. But what fun, eh?!

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Ya' Can't Beat a Dancing Robot!

Well Christmas was fantastic - a great week with the family. Lucas and Joe were the big winners of the foosball tournament we held. Tracey and Elizabeth hung in there, though, and actually scored a couple of points - I'll post their video later! A wonderful time was had by all, I believe, and one of the big hits was this dancing robot that Baba and Jiji gave Lucas. It says clever things like, "My Spidey-sense is tingling!" and "Fancy a spin around town?" (Now, wait a minute - with lines like spin around town, where is this Spidey-sense located????)

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Christmas Disappointments

Last night Lucas said, "Mom, wemembuh last year Santa left me a note saying he was sowwy he was out of the game I wanted so he bwought me something else? I bet I get anothuh note this year. I bet I don't get anything I asked for. But that's okay, I'll just put that stuff on next year's Chwistmas list."

We're experts at notes explaining lapses in events - see the example below, of which I am particularly proud!

Yo, yo, yo, check it out Dog, check it out….

David Archuleta lost a tooth last night – you know, the guy from American Idol? I went to get it and ended up hanging out with Paula, Simon, and Randy. I’m very sorry I didn’t get your tooth last night, so I left you an extra dollar.

We cool?

Peace out,

Tooth Fairy

(What you're missing is the giant picture of the Tooth Fairy I inserted from Clip Art - brilliant!) Lucas told us the other night that note made him feel so special, like he was David Archuleta's twin since they lost a tooth the same night!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Precious Angels Singing....and Stretching

I can't make it to the actual performance so I went to the dress rehearsal (because I really am a good mother - really), and here's a little sample. I have another clip where he actually smiles at me, but then I apparently develop Parkinson's and it is nausea-inducing for the viewer, so we'll skip that. The great thing about this clip is the kids on either side of him. Who thinks it's a good idea for first graders to stand in hot choir robes for 30 minutes singing song after song? I honestly thought the little girl next to him was fixing to faint at one point.

I think we should get back to the cheesy little plays we used to do. Like in the 5th grade when the "chorus" (i.e. kids like me who weren't cute enough to get a speaking part) had to pass around a plate of cookies and say in unison, "Thank you, Mrs. Claus." Except we were all too shy to actually say it, so the plate just kept getting passed around till the teacher said it for us.

Or in the 6th grade when I actually did get a speaking part as Anne from England where I had to describe the Christmas tree being kept in the bathtub and presents being left in our shoes, and Daddy tried to bribe me to say, "and we have a BLOODY good Christmas!" Mother took me aside and told me that would be cursing, so I better not do it. Another early opportunity at comedy missed....

Monday, December 15, 2008

What did I Come in Here For?

Well, I had something funny I wanted to say this morning, and I told Scott about it on the phone, and damned if I can remember what it was now. It was something to do with Drew.....oh! I think it was the Dirty Santa party the youth group did last night (I want you to know I sat here for 4 minutes before I remembered that). As soon as he heard it was Dirty Santa he said he wanted to go - didn't ask who was going, anybody he knew, where it was, nothing. So we pull up to the house and his friend Dillon's dad is standing in the door, so I think it'll be cool. Drew walks right on in and doesn't even say bye.

Two hours later I go pick him up and ask him what he ended up with, and he says, "a cheap yo-yo." So of course I give him a lecture about how he was privileged to go and he should be thankful for anything, etc., etc. I ask him if he had fun and he says yes. I say who did you know there, and he says, "nobody but Dillon's sister" (Dillon was sick) and a precious neighbor boy who shot at 2 of our windows a couple of years ago and used to throw rocks at the boys....and who also mooned them one time. So I'm thinking Drew's more of an optimist than I gave him credit for if he thought that was a fun party!

He shows us the yo-yo when we get home, and sure enough, it weighs less than an ounce and says "I'm drug free" on the side. I think the church got a bunch of free stuff to wrap up as gifts, then requested that the kids bring a $10 donation to a charity instead of real gifts. I've got to call scam on that. At least let the kids pick out the cheap gifts to give each other! His other choice besides the yo-yo was an address book - he pointed out that he doesn't really need to record anybody's anniversary date at this age. I'm inclined to agree.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Decorating the Tree

Video you say? It would've turned out better than the pictures did, that's for sure. All you can tell for sure is that the tree is very small. But you may be able to see that Lucas hung all his ornaments at his eye level, so there were about 20 ornaments there and the rest of the tree was bare. There was the usual little snippiness about whose ornament was whose (because of course you're only allowed to hang up your own ornaments!), but I could usually break that up by pointing out that most of the ornaments were, in fact, mine from 1979 or 1984, etc. You know Mimi always wrote the name and date on there; thanks Mimi!

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Oh Christmas Tree...Silent Night

The boys and I got the tree today while Dean was working. I sawed off some lower branches using the handsaw (I was tempted to use that electric thing, but Drew can't drive yet and I'd probably exsanguinate before the ambulance arrived), and Drew helped me get it straight in the stand and carry it in the house. We had Christmas music playing while we decorated it and it was a very lovely time. The only thing missing this year was the yelling!

I know anybody with a spouse must go through this every Christmas if you get a live tree: toting it in while it's dropping needles everywhere and crashing into furniture that your spouse didn't get out of the way, getting it into the stand which your spouse has put in the wrong spot, holding it straight while your spouse dinks around and takes too long with the screws on the stand, etc., etc. Maybe you take turns being the one who's competent in this situation vs. the nincompoop, but I have to play the nincompoop every year. So this year I cast Drew in that role.

I only took a nasty tone once. I gouged my finger really good when the tree guy shoved it in the car with my help, so both boys were nauseous on the way home because I showed them the flap of skin that came up by my cuticle (I didn't even cry). I went to the sink to wash my finger and asked the boys to get me a bandaid. Lucas ran to his bathroom and came back saying, "I'm weally sowwy Mom, but I'm out of bandaids." Drew is just sitting there, so I ask him, and he says, "Yes, I have bandaids." Still sitting there....HELLLOOOOOO! I said in a very acid tone, "Well I'm standing here dripping blood in the sink - any speed you can muster to go get me a bandaid would be much appreciated." What's with these 12-year-olds?

Anyway, it was a very peaceful Christmas-type atmosphere and Drew helped with the lights while Lucas put on the star, plus Dean was very happy to have avoided that whole scene, so Joy to the World!

Friday, December 12, 2008

Never mind

Never mind that last post - we had a change of plans. You know, I don't know if it was the pressure of blogging as often as possible, or possibly having to make jokes about things like farts.....I just don't know. Maybe it's the scrutiny of the public (as opposed to the scrutiny of the privates - oh haha, that one surprised even me - where does that COME from?).

At any rate, I shall continue here relying only on your comments and constructive criticisms - feel free to let them fly; at least I'll know somebody's reading this, and that's all I really want.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Team Blog

I've invited my siblings to contribute to the Blog - it'll be the Arnold team blog if you will, though I can't change the name officially. We have yet to find out if it'll work - let's hear something from you, Scott & Tracey. (No pressure!)

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Just a Quick Lucas-ism

We got Lucas's hair cut today. He said he wanted a buzz cut so that he wouldn't have to comb it or put water on it, and that "last time I got that weally short haircut I looked so handsome with it."

And didn't I learn my lesson about using the word "buzz cut" before? No, apparently I didn't, because she whipped out the trimmer faster than you can say Semper Fi and piles of hair were flying before I could issue a retraction. Not that I didn't try, mind you. I did yell out, "I don't want to see scalp, he just really wants it off of his forehead!" But he was all smiles at the end, so I guess it went over okay. She actually made a joke about it at the end. She said, "There, isn't it nice when they can comb their hair and wash their face at the same time?"

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Yale Club Fun

Did somebody famous just get married at the Yale Club? Quick, somebody google that! My meeting was at the Yale Club, across the street from Grand Central and apparently where you go work out then spend the night if you're a Yale alumnus with no friends in New York. I was going back to the hotel Saturday during a break and was on the elevator when a lovely bride with a fancy-schmancy dress and her handsome groom got on with me. Of course she got out first in the lobby and headed for the front door, and of course I was behind her because I was leaving too, so when the photographers and video cameramen started recording I was probably in the picture.

Because there were paparazzi, people! (Okay, 2 cameramen and 3 photographers only qualify as paparazzinni I guess.) I looked at them really hard but didn't recognize them, so maybe they were just models on a shoot, but there was a mighty big party there later that night, so something was definitely up. Of course, maybe the paparazzini were there for moi, lithe and nimble, able to go to the knees in a split second with nary a flinch, then rise to towering height with the force of one quadricep alone....stumbling just a bit as said quadricep rarely gets used.

(Who remembers the Looney Tunes where Daffy Duck as Robin Hood is merrily tripping...tripping...TRIPPING along? It's really funny in my head.)

Monday, December 8, 2008

Back From NYC

I'm back! I had a weekend trip to NYC (New York CITY!!!!!) for work, and all I have to say is do not EVER stay at the Hyatt at Grand Central. Unless you bring your irritable crying babies. Or a very loud Ipod. Those walls are paper thin.....and by paper I mean toilet paper. On one side was a nice couple (and by nice I mean I couldn't hear them talking much) with a kid who screamed needlessly at any time for any reason. On the other side was a Hispanic family (although Saturday night they seemed to be speaking French) who were rather loud and sick. The poor lady coughed all night. I started to shove some Sucrets (who remembers Sucrets???) under the adjoining door, but I didn't have any Sucrets. Yes - both rooms on either side of me were adjoining. When I went to bed (and by went to bed I mean lay under the covers to listen to them instead of sitting and listening to them) I could even see the nice people's light under the door! That's the only time I've ever excused myself after farting in a hotel room alone.

(Oh, see what I did there? I made up a funny joke that would embarrass normal people, but I don't ever have gas or fart, so I can say that and not be embarrassed, because everybody KNOWS it's not true.)

The other funny thing was that I fell down in the lobby Friday night on the way up to my room after dinner. Now that was really funny, but don't tell Dean or he won't let me out of the house without an aide! I was coming down 4 little marble steps to the bank of elevators in the huge grand lobby, and somehow my left foot went into space instead of that last step, and I found myself falling gracefully to land on both knees just as pretty as you please. It must've looked like I meant to do it - there was no flailing or gasping, although there's no telling what my face was doing. Two British ladies were getting off the closest elevator and one of them said, "Are you alright there?" while turning to come to my aid. But my expression must've been so peaceful and I said, "Yes, I just missed that step completely," and somehow rose back to my feet without using my hands, so she quickly diverted back to where she was headed. (That or she thought I was dangerous.)

Anyway, I don't think I'll travel alone to big cities too much more by myself. Between the clutziness and the Mad Cow I'm a danger to myself and others. And if I ever do go back with an aide, we sho' won't be stayin' at the Hyatt!

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Clarification on Dr. Pepper at 5 AM

It has come to my attention that my implications were misunderstood about breakfast with the Bonners. I preferred runny eggs to Mamaw's, which I thought were a little dry and overdone. Momma had the winners clearly. They also did not leave us alone - Papaw was always home if Mamaw had to work. We were never endangered.

That is all.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

The Exhibitionist

Tonight was the dance exhibition for Drew's ballroom dance class (don't ask - big hoity-toity tradition apparently). The boys and girls sat on opposite sides of the room, then stood and began "The Grand March" when the instructor started up the music....which was an instrumental version of It's a Small World (how old are these kids?). They met up with their partner and continued to march for several minutes for some reason, then proceeded to do the 3-count swing, 1-count swing, cha-cha, and box step or something. (Sadly, there was no tango.)

It's so sweet to watch your son escort a girl to her seat, or spin her during the dance. (A tiny tear came to my eye - shhhhh - don't tell Dean.) And the music wasn't too bad - Drew said it was "crazy music," but it was actually Maroon 5 and some other popular stuff I didn't recognize. The 2 stinkers were Mony Mony by Billy Idol (what were they thinking?) and Under the Boardwalk (really, how old does she think these kids are?). Then the final dance was with a parent, and she chose I Like That Old Time Rock'n'Roll (how old does she think we are?).

Drew did a great job, but I pulled a typical faux pas. When we rocked back (1-step swing) I soundly stepped on another mother's foot who was also rocking back.....and I mean soundly. Lucky for me we all had to sign waivers prior to dancing!